Why do i find it hard to let go of you? There are times when I wonder if this feeling is really love. Love isn’t supposed to hurt this much. But I am hurting. I used to wonder why people would make a big deal out of a break-up or separation from a romantic partner. I used to think that people who can’t get over a break-up is just being silly. Now I know better. I am not supposed to hurt this bad. I do not know you well. We have not been together physically. But I am in pain. Sobra. I wish I would get over this phase of healing so I can move on. Di ko ma explain eh. Maybe you have really become a part of me coz even when I am preoccupied with things I am supposed to do, your name would suddenly appear in my thoughts. Then I’d remember your face, lalo na pag bagong gising ka. Feeling of sheer happiness would accompany the vision, but later on, the feelings of emptiness and loneliness would replace the blissful feeling. Alam ko ksi na i have lost you. I hope I can finally say GOODBYE to you. I want to cry my heart out then say BYE for the last time pero bat di ako maiyak ng ganun. Yun yung nararamdaman ko kaya ang bigat ng feeling eh.. I want to weep. Pero di ko mailabas. I know there is a part of me that is still hopeful that you’d love me for who I am and not for who you want me to be. But REALITY tells me that it isn’t going to happen coz you love HER so much to let me be who I am. And I can’t be HER. After our talk yesterday, lalo akong nasaktan pero mas natatanggap ko na. Sana you’d be happy with her. Sana sya na nga. But this is one thing I am going to tell you, I HAVE LOVED YOU and I think it will take a long time for me to feel the same way again. Take care…ingatz!
